Mary Gordon and Roots of Empathy
January 16, 2006
By Nicole Zummach
TORONTO, ON // Parents, educators, and even politicians often say that children are our future. Yet, looking at the worldwide statistics on childhood poverty, abuse, and exploitation, this platitude seems to have lost its resonance. But there is one woman for whom this statement isn't simply lip service. Mary Gordon has worked with children, parents and educators for more than 25 years. In 1996, founded her own organization, Roots of Empathy, an evidence-based classroom program that aims to raise social and emotional competence and increase empathy among schoolchildren. Now being practiced in schools across Canada and around the world, the program is having a dramatic effect in reducing levels of aggression and violence among young people. In 2002, Ashoka Canada recognized Gordon for her work as a social entrepreneur, making her the first female Ashoka Fellow in Canada. CharityVillage spoke with Gordon about why she started Roots of Empathy, the impact of becoming an Ashoka Fellow, and her belief that empathic children will create a more peaceful future for all of us.
CharityVillage: Roots of Empathy is celebrating its 10th anniversary this year. What are the roots of this initiative?
Mary Gordon: The Roots of Empathy concept came from working with children and families and seeing the intergenerational violence and poor parenting, and wanting to break that cycle. I realized that the only way to break the cycle is through the children. I believe that children really are the power for change in the future. And I believe that babies are close to magic in that they can bring out, in even the most wounded or angry child, their humanity. By observing a baby in a non-threatening way, children come in touch with their most vulnerable and beautiful self. This is what I had seen in my parenting centre work and in all my home visits and all my work with domestic violence and child abuse. There is this universal that we all love babies and the attachment relationship between mother and baby is the most important relationship in the lifetime.
We are a research-based organization, but this didn't come out of a research base; it came out of my experience. I proceed with research at every step to measure the impact [of the program]. Are we doing what I think we're doing? What is the evidence with the children? What are the behavioural changes? How do we know this works? So, everywhere we go, we insist on research and evaluation.
CV: How does being an Ashoka Fellow fit in with all of this?
MG: What happens through Ashoka is that I'm asked very often to be the equivalent of their poster person for explaining social entrepreneurism, because the concept is relatively new in the world. The World Bank is funding me to go, in concert with Ashoka, to Paris at the end of the month to speak to the world of philanthropy, government, and corporations about the concept of social entrepreneurism in France. I use Roots of Empathy as a vehicle to explain the concept, but I don't necessarily want to have Roots of Empathy in France next week. It's about using the example, the story of Roots of Empathy and my journey as a social entrepreneur - how a person came up with this idea and how the idea materialized into changing and breaking cycles. I want France to embrace French people who have found creative ways to solve social problems. I want them to look inward, not outward.
CV: You created Roots of Empathy in 1996, but it wasn't until 2002 that you became an Ashoka Fellow. Did the fellowship impact your work?
MG: Sure, it impacted my work because it gave me international colleagues who are involved in related pursuits. In other words, when you are a social entrepreneur you are really on your own. People often say, 'Oh that's a far out idea. No one is ever going to understand that.' You're always scrambling for money and you are always totally responsible. And you are dealing with very complex issues, like how to norm-shift attitudes in the general society. How do you move people who have government power to understand? To be exposed to people who have solved these same sorts of problems - What were their strategies? What did they find useful? What sorts of groups did they bring together? What worked and what didn't? Ashoka gave me a family that I didn't have to explain myself to. Everyone got me. It was a homecoming; that's what Ashoka was.
CV: What have you learned through your work in the past decade, both as an individual and the head of an organization?
MG: What I've learned is that people understand best through relationship, rather than logic. If you want people to understand a complex or new concept, such as social entrepreneurism, you have to connect with them on some level. Through that connection it's much easier to explain or to norm-shift; it's not just about people understanding. I think it's about broadening the vista so that people can appreciate that solving problems of a social nature by going with a concept that one person has come up with - the power of the right person with the right idea at the right time - is powerful. And over time it's what really has changed things. I think one has to capture the moment and build a team that will support and understand what they are trying to do. Communication is key, and communication includes the ability to relate, not just to send the message but to relate to the receiver. To really communicate you have to relate. In Roots of Empathy we are very much about the idea that everything significant that happens in life is pretty much within the context of a relationship.
CV: What's coming up for you and your organization in the next few years?
MG: We have all kinds of offers to go all over the world, but quite honestly, my first loyalty is to Canada. We're in nine provinces now; we're in French and English; we're on and off reserves - we are hugely committed to the Aboriginal peoples of this country. I would like to see a deeper spread of the program in Canada, and to be able to offer it in the hard-to-reach places. Another big initiative we have going now is Seeds of Empathy, the little brother of Roots of Empathy. It's specifically for children in nursery schools and childcare centres. It's a program where I work with the staff of the centres to build empathy between the staff and help them understand the children. It's taking off like wildfire.
The marginalization that happens in our world is destructive of economies, and destructive of cultures, and destructive of the future of our children. Roots of Empathy is whittling away at that by helping children become inclusive so that marginalization is not acceptable. You don't aggress against someone when you have empathy for him or her. A more empathic, caring society will be more solicitous of the vulnerable, like our children. That is the bigger picture of what we are going after here. We've had the civil rights movement, we've had the apartheids of the world, we've had the women's movement, but you ain't seen nothing, because we're going to have a children's movement!
For more information about Roots of Empathy,
visit: www.rootsofempathy.org.
To learn more about Ashoka, visit: www.ashoka.org/us-canada/main/canada.cfm.
